Resume.

Gwen said i should post it. :) And therefore. I shall. Lol.


**

Sanjay Hajimoko Ramachandran Samivalu Putria Prrrrratap
66, Jalan SJ 33,
Taman Enam Tiga,
36633, Kuala Kangsar,
Perak.

___________________________________________

Mr. U. R. Fayerd
Principal of Tadika Kindergarten
Lot 66, Jalan Tiga,
Nambersix Garden,
63366, Pantai Harapan,
Terengganu. 3 JUNE 1999


Dear Sir,

Re : Application to Apply for Part-Time Kindergarten Teacher and Counsellor.

Regarding to the above title, I hope to get a part-time job as a teacher and since I adore children (also known as kids), I hope to be a part-time kindergarten teacher. I am writing in response to your advertisement in http://www.idesperatelyneedmoneyfast.com/ on 1st June 1999. I believe that I am capable and suitable for the job since I love children and kids, which are the same thing. I will explain why you should hire me.

2. I don't mean to brag, but I am perfect for the job. Being the eldest in my family and having to share my room with 15 more siblings (yes, 15) since young I have been trained up to be tolerant and to have leadership qualities. I guess those qualities come with the package of 15 screaming babies. I also have a unique sense of humour. Have I ever mentioned you have nice hair? Tho I've never really seen you before, but yea. You get my point.

3. I am a very friendly person. I make friends easily regardless of age. I am sure the kids (also known as children) in your kindergarten would appreciate and extra friend. I am also a very interested person, as you can see from my name. I was brought up in a very....unique family, also, as you can see in my name.

4. I am very skillful. I can pronounce my name backwards, spell my name backwards and also, break my elbow and attach it back (cool huh?!). and it only took me 3 years and several major surgeries to enable myself to do so. I enjoy entertaining and teaching children, not to mention patient enough to hear their problems out for example, a serious situation such as being abused by parents or in other minor cases, losing their Superman eraser, making an "oopsie" in their pants and also the most frequently heard, "He called me fat!" tho I have no interest in solving them. Attached is my resume and certificates that might come in handy.

Thank you and I do look forward to your reply.

Yours faithfully,
Sanjay Hajimoko Ramachandran Samivalu Putria Prrrrratap
(SANJAY HAJIMOKO RAMACHANDRAN SAMIVALU PUTRIA PRRRRRATAP)


___________________________________________________

Sanjay Hajimoko Ramachandran Samivalu Putria Prrrrratap

Residential address : 66, Jalan SJ 33,
Taman Enam Tiga,
36633, Kuala Kangsar,
Perak.
Race : Japanese-Indian with a dash of Hawaiian, Japanese, Chinese, Portuguese
Gender : Male - Or at least, since last checked.
Telephone number : 03-63663333 (residence)
Handphone number: 013-3636363
Email address : obsessedwithnumbers3n6@yahoo.com
Date of birth : 6th March 1963
Age : 36 (my favourite year)
_______________________________________________
CAREER OBJECTIVES

Long term

• To increase my experience in teaching field as well as counselling.



• To learn baby talk.



• To use my knowledge and help children (eg. Never borrow money from a loan shark when you grow up - personal experience)
  
  

Short term

• To earn enough money to pay my debts
  
  

_________________________________________
EDUCATION

- I can't remember -

Primary level

January 1979 - November 1983

• SJK (C) Fei Chai
  UPSR - 1A, 1B, 1C, 1D, 1E, 1F (ABCDEF :D)
  

_________________________________________
Languages

• English - Fluent in written and spoken mediums


• Mandarin and Cantonese - Fluent in written and spoken medium


• Japanese - Fluent in spoken medium


• Tamil - Fluent in spoken medium


• Hokkien and Hainanese - Basic skills in spoken medium


• Korean, Hawaiian, Hakka, Arab - Can count from 1 to 10

__________________________________________
ACHIEVEMENTS

So far... Nothing. I DID manage to juggle 3 grapefruits yesterday tho for 2 times.

__________________________________________
PERSONAL ATTRIBUTES

Lazy but extremely honest

Although I am lazy, but I am extremely honest which is why you should hire me. In fact, I owe the loan sharks RM10,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000.00 and I have no idea how to pay them back. Honestly, I can care less.

Unreliable but optimistic

Altho I promised to pay RM10,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000.00 back before next week, I crossed my fingers. But, who cares right? I have free pork heads (no offence to the Muslims k? (: ) to eat everyday since I've borrowed such a great amount of money to gamble. They always hang it outside my house everyday at 8.00am sharp when they find that I'm not at home. Those idiots do not know I'm hiding under my bed.

Cool and special

I have chosen your kindergarten due to your address. I am a very cool and special person. I have a cool nose ring for the kids to play with. Also, I can touch my nose with my tongue. I am sure the children will like me

______________________________
LEISURE / INTERESTS

Women.

****

THE END!

Over and out :D

Running for other people's lives.

YES. TODAY WAS THE CROSS COUNTRY DAY.

Not to mention valentines day.

No, I didn't hold hands with a guy. =.=

So cross country was fun. :D

It was held at Lake Gardens. (again) And this time, I didn't have to wake up at 6! :D Uhh. But still, 6.30 was early too. Haha. 30 minutes extra sleeping-time! =D

So everyone was there. The stupid grassland was muddy and damp, just like last year. I got bitten by insects, just like last year. And I came home with aches everywhere. JUST LIKE LAST YEAR.

And you know what?

IT'S GONNA REPEAT ALL OVER AGAIN NEXT YEAR.

But I had laughs.

Prime : I like the part where the guy said something about fresh air.
Layin : Yea, me too...
Prime : I disagree.
Layin : HAHAHAHAHAHA!!

It was true. Some parts of the route smells like, uhh... rotten leaves.

Prime : Hey, do you know how to insult someone without them knowing?
Layin : No, how?
Damien : Yea, how?
Prime : I'm sorry. You're not smart enough to know this.

HAHAHAHAHAHA. omg. AND AND AND...

Prime : Is it hot here, or is it you?
Layin : Err....
Prime : Oh no wait, IT'S ME. =D

Oh OHHHH. :D

Layin : *exhausted* Prime, would you mind if you have a 50kg girl on your back while you run to the finish line? (Meaning 'will you carry me all the way to the finish line?')
Prime : Err.. yes, i do.
Layin : Aww. =(
Prime : How would YOU mind having a 75kg boy on your back all the way to the finishing line?
Layin : Err. NO THANK YOU.

HAHAHAHAHA. omg xD


Thank you, Prime for the wonderful time in Lake Gardens! :D

*I'm so sorry I ran off after the cross country to the play ground. I'm still a kid, ya know? xD

*lalalalala*

Over and out.

Busy.

Okay. So maybe I DO need to take some time out to keep this blog alive.

Anyone knows how to do Blog CPR?

Mine's dying. AGAIN.

Eesh.

Okay umm lets see.

This week has been fine so far. :D

Tuesday we didn't have Sejarah and Art. *Starts dancing around crazily*

Then today we didn't have double science. :D *Continues dancing*

And gymrama seems fine.


PJK time was scary. :O
So maybe I shouldn't run and laugh loudly when I'm having cough.

Laughing = Can't breathe
Coughing = Can't breathe
Runing = Need to breathe.

Do the math.

I ended up sitting on the floor coughing and breathing at the same time.

NOT a good sign.

I blame Gwen for the laughing part.

Nevertheless, awesome week this has been.

Reminder : -

• Need to stop sending 50 messages a day.
• Get a valentine.
• Get a new crush.
• Make sure new crush is either same age, or older.
• Stop talking crap.
• Stop typing crap in blog.

I guess that's all.


Over and out.

Layina.

Layina.

TADA. MY NEW INDIAN NAME.



Everybody : You have too many names lah.
You : No I don't.
Everybody : Not you, you. Her, you.
Her : What?
What : Yes? Someone called?
Someone : No i did not.
I : I did what?
Someone : Not talking to you.
You : NOW YOU'RE NOT TALKING TO ME?? T.T
Everybody : STAY OUT OF THIS.




SO....

Layina. So awesome right? :D
Sounds like hyena(sp?) though. =/
But hey. I laugh like one.
So whatever.

Gwen : You? Laugh like a hyena? HAHAHAHA OH PLEASE LA. A HYENA CAN LAUGH BETTER THAN YOU OKAY. *and on with the insults* AND AND AND THE HYENA'S TEETH IS STRAIGHTER THAN YOURS.... *blah blah blah*


...


I hate you people.
You : You hate me?
Me : You do?
You : I do what?
I : Pardon?
Layin : SHUT UP!!


Geez.

And I just found out I let my name out.

And ummm. The picture. I'm ugly in real life.

SO YEA. PLEASE DON'T STALK ME.

(not like anyone would want to)

over and out.

Tay Lay Yin.

You people have issues with my name. =(


See? SEE?? That's my donation form!! :D

Tada... 23 ppl!! hehe. x)

I bet you just went up to check the 1st picture to see whether my name was spelled wrongly or not.

And if you didn't.. You just did.

Is it really that hard to spell my name correctly ah?

And you know what? LAST YEAR'S LEO CARNIVAL THEY SPELLED MY NAME WRONGLY TOO.

T.T everyone hates me.

Over and out.

Randomness.

"The wind picked up rather suddenly, sending the Minister's notes for his speech and other rubbish flying across the grass"

Q.: Does 'too-tee-too-too-too' actually mean anything?
A. : Yes, it does. Russian hotels it means two cups of tea to Room No. 22 please.

In Taiwan, the translation of the Pepsi slogan “Come alive with the Pepsi Generation” came out as “Pepsi will bring your ancestors back from the dead.”

Also in Chinese, the Kentucky Fried Chicken slogan “finger-lickin’ good” came out as “eat your fingers off.”

When Parker Pen marketed a ballpoint pen in Mexico, its ads were supposed to say “It won’t leak in your pocket and embarrass you.” However, the company’s mistakenly thought the Spanish word “embarazar” meant embarrass. Instead the ads said that “It wont leak in your pocket and make you pregnant.”

An American T-shirt maker in Miami printed shirts for the Spanish market which promoted the Pope’s visit. Instead of the desired “I Saw the Pope” in Spanish, the shirts proclaimed “I Saw the Potato.”

In Italy, a campaign for Schweppes Tonic Water translated the name into Schweppes Toilet Water.

In a Yugoslavian hotel: The flattening of your underwear with pleasure is the job of the chambermaid.

On the menu of a Polish hotel: Salad a firm’s own make; limpid red beet soup with cheesy dumplings in the form of a finger; roasted duck let loose; beef rashers beaten up in the country people’s fashion.

Advertisement for donkey rides in Thailand: Would you like to ride on your own a*s?

Detour sign in Kyushi, Japan: Stop: Drive Sideways.

In a Swiss mountain inn: Special today- no ice cream.

At a Budapest zoo: Please do not feed the animals. If you have any suitable food, give it to the guard on duty.

*pokes guard*
Layin : Want some peanuts?

From a Japonese information booklet about using a hotel air conditioner: Coolesand Heates: If you want just condition of warm in your room, please control yourself.

Yes, I'm random. x) But that's not very random YET.

*Opens Layin's mind*

1. Are there any left handed monkeys?
2. Is waterproof coffee bean invented?
3. Left handed screwdrivers...
4. Pink coloured gold.
5. A one way elevator.
6. A portable grand piano.
7. A blond Chinese.
8. Can you swallow twice in 1 second?
9. Is big foot left handed?
10. Do ants have brains??

HAHAHAHAHA.

***

"It's like a pregnant woman telling you, all you have to do is push." - Clarissa.

LOL.

Over and out.

Translations.

Ever wonder how English ppl are supposed to order food in China?


Well, they have this really wonderful machine to translate menus for them.


Watch and learn ppl.

Retchup? MEAT SAUCE? Things just get better. I think I'll take the Dlum juice Mexico cilliy sauce please. Oh. And add the sheet iron too. Thank you.

I think I'll have...Coca coca for myself... what's that, darling? Oh yes, my two daughters would like Sprit and Sankist. One each.

o.o So am I supposed to pay the fish a soup?

Hmmm... This cowboy leg tastes like chicken.

I never knew cowboys are for sale.

So is it or not??

I don't know about you but I suddenly lost my appetite.

Strange..... I'm not hungry anymore.

HAHAHAHAHAHA. xD

Over and OWT!!